TO DYE OR NOT TO DYE: Those Stubborn Gray Hairs

I just can’t. I just can’t look at myself and see gray hairs around my edges. I’m lucky they are not all through my hair but the edges are more than enough to make me feel those stubborn grays are aging me at least five years.

My daughter says I should keep them.

They look good on you. She says.

Out of the mouth of babes sometimes come the dumbest things, Of course she is all for gray hairs at twenty-four. I probably said the same nonsense to my mother, however, her testimony falls on deaf ears.  So  without haste I retouch those roots at first sight but gray hairs  are so resilient. It doesn’t matter if I my hair professionally colored or use  boxed colorants they come back in less than a month like my worst nightmare, screaming like a crazed Jack Nicolson at the Outlook Hotel.

Yeah, seeing those gray hairs make me feel  like screaming just like that.

I see  women, especially in my family, who embrace the gray and look fabulous rocking it…I  just can’t give into it…I just can’t. I know there are a lot of things I am going to have to get used to as this aging thing rolls on but I’m not ready for gray.

I’m a happy grandma. I’m a content forty-something almost fifty-something but I can’t give into this. And these two women are stunning!

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I hope my daughter will dye my hair when I no longer am able and I hope she dyes it something like this color :)

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Kerry Washington: Allure Magazine Cover

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We all know she didn’t quite wake up like this but I have to agree with the countless blogs I’ve read in the last few days, this is a gorgeous cover of her. I am no fan of Olivia “crybaby,quivering lips, Pope but I love Kerry Washington. She exudes intelligence, elegance, and commitment to community. She’s a vocal activitst woman, someone whom when we see her in an interview can be proud of. Yes, I love Ms. Washington and this is a very beautiful ‘naked’ cover.o-KERRY-WASHINGTON-facebook

To Grandma or Not to Grandma

Everyone has asked me what my new granddaugter, my apple scrapple, is going to call me.

‘You look to young to be called grandma, you have to come up with something not so old sounding’

WOMP I don’t think of myself as old, only when it benefits me but okay.

‘How about Glam-ma or Glammama” my co-worker suggested. “That’s what NeNe on Real Housewives of Atlanta calls herself because she’s too fly to be called grandma. You look like a glam-ma’

WOMP WOMP Oh, no the hell I don’t.  I don’t ever, ever, evahevahevah want to imitate anything of NeNe of RHO-ATL. Don’t get me wrong NeNe is fab in her way but her attitude sucks. If she epitomizes the word glam-ma with her behavior, I’ll pass. Plus, it just sounds stupid.

“Girl please, NeNe is just keeping it real’

Insert eyeroll here. That’s not real its just buffonery for a paycheck. Next.

“How about G-ma? That’s cute.”

All I can hear in my head is my little grandbaby sounding like 50Cent yelling G-unit. No thank you.

“GG”

Not bad, really buuuuut….no, maybe if my name were Gertrude or Gina. Just doesnt feel like me.

“Mawmaw?”

uhhhh I am too old to for that. I, mean you might as well call me Big Momma, right?

“MeMe”

If I were French, yes.

“Nana,nannie?

No, No, No. I think she is running out of steam.

“Well what then?”

I have no problem with being a grandmother. It still blows my mind that I have an adult child who can actually be a father and extend my family tree by two new branches (his beautiful sigificant other and their child Autumn). To look at him and know I created him and he created her makes me feel blessed to be her grandma and a part of her life. I’m fine with grandma.

No worries my little apple scrapple your grandma is always here.

Scandal & the Limited

I’m not a Scandal fan. Olivia Pope works my nerves. She’s always crying or her lips are trembling getting ready to cry. That is not Gladiator isht. Now Mellie? She’s a damn gladiator. However, Olivia Pope’s wardrobe is sick! I was excited to hear the news of the Scandal/Limited collaboration. I knew the line wouldn’t be as spectacular as that infamous white coat but I didn’t expect to be so disappointed.
I went to the Limited at Providence Place mall so maybe that location didn’t get a great selection.
How impressed were you fashionistas?
Is my local Limited slacking?

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I loved this pink sweater but not the $89 price tag. Its a strong maybe though.

Vision

If your mind can conceive it then you can achieve it.

This is my least favorite inspirational quote. Everytime I hear someone say it I roll my eyes.

It should come with pages of postscripts

But you better be prepared to work your ass off. Believe in yourself when no one else will. Fall down, get up, fall down harder and get back up. You better be thick skinned. Have back up plan to your back plan. Be prepared to sleep less and worry more. You will have to compromis and improvise. Know that part of succeeding is failing. It never happens over night. You will cry. Be prepared to feel anxiety worse than any monster under the bed childhood nightmares. Be prepared to think life sucks. Be pepared to want to lay in the bed all morning and just give up…but that vision never dies for some of us. We get up the next day and try again and begin again, again and again.

Courage

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#LessClassicallyBeautiful

I’ve been following the NY Times article ‘Wrought in Rhimes Image’ by Alessandra Stanely and her classifying Rhimes and her black female characters as ‘angry black women’. Honestly, I’m a huge fan Rhimes because she is in the place I would love to be and she hasn’t let excuses hinder her writing. I could be jealous but I’m not, I’m proud.

I’m no huge fan of Olivia Pope because I feel she’s milestones away from being ‘an angry black woman’ and just a big cry baby. Every time I tune in her lips are trembling and she is about to have yet another crying moment, complicated she is, torn, yes but angry, no.

Stanley did the automatic stereotypical dismissal of black women in Rhimes show  by throwing that tag out like it was fact. I honestly don’t believe she watches Rhimes characters. Maybe, she is the one who is jealous. Stanley article is largely dismissive of Rhimes as if she were not a real player in this game. I could be shocked but I’m not. Stanley sounds more threatened by Rhimes and her characters. She specifically took aim at a new character in the series How to Get Away with Murder (airs tonight on ABC)  played by Viola Davis as ‘less classically beautiful’. She described this dark skinned African woman as 1. the angry black woman and 2. less classically beautiful.

Quote:The actress doesn’t look at all like the typical star of a network drama,” Stanley wrote. “Ignoring the narrow beauty standards some African-American women are held to, Rhimes chose a performer who is older, darker-skinned and less classically beautiful than [Kerry Washington], or for that matter Halle Berry, who played an astronaut on the summer mini-series Extant.”

It almost sounds like a big high five then it doesn’t. When I think of classically beautiful, yes I may think of Kerry Washington but I also think of Viola Davis because she in her speech, in her demeanor, in her gracefulness DEFINES classically beautiful. Stanley is actually doing to black women what we have done to ourselves by publically acknowledging our definition of beauty being somewhat lighter skin with straighter hair. I’m happy there is backlash against this whole article that was nothing but undercurrent digs at not only Rhimes but black women.

I am proud that we are learning to define ourselves and start to tear down the walls of what is beautiful and the stereotype of the angry black woman.

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